From: Centurion A.G. Cerberus (Galand@cris.com) Subject: Cerberus: The Return, part 2 Newsgroups: alt.barney.dinosaur.die.die.die Date: 1997/05/10 Cerberus: The Return, Part 2 ---------------------------- "Left Turn at Alberqueque" He walked on, until he came to the massive entrance to the spaceport on this strange new world. He noticed a pair of burly, heavily-armed guards at the entrance, and wondered if he would be required to surrender his weaponry…he found he didn’t like that idea much. His fears proved to be unfounded however as he watched a troop of mercenary furs (As he had mentally labeled this race) walk right on in, loaded down with heavy weaponry and battle equipment. { Must be an open port..} he mused as he strolled past, looking at the various signs on the walls, searching for any hint of something familiar. Suddenly he tensed, as strong prickling feeling erupted at the back of his neck, and all his senses came alert. He was being watched…and though he didn’t know how, he could tell that whoever was watching wasn’t friendly. Ducking down a side passage, he saw reflected in an office window a group of four humanoids, dressed in gaudy purple uniforms and carrying weapons that looked like toy rifles. Each one had a wide smile on their faces, and their eyes were vacant of any real conscious thought. He ducked into a service alcove along the wall and watched them pass, chattering inanely among themselves, and about how pleased someone named "Lord Barney" would be when they caught up with "Centurion Cerberus." {Why are these goons looking for me? } thought Cerberus, { I haven’t done anything wrong on this world… and if being human’s a crime, they’re as guilty as I am. } But no matter what, he felt some deep-seated need to cause mayhem and death upon this group of people…he fought the urge off, telling himself that if he went around lopping heads off, he really WOULD be in trouble. He heard them come around for another pass, and he suddenly wished he was invisible…He prepared to run for it, when one of them looked right at him…and didn’t see him! Amazing! He had wished to be unnoticeable, and ceased to be of interest to the world…he boldly stepped out in front of the group, smiling at them. His concentration slipped, faltered, failed….and he became very much visible as they closed to within arm’s reach. "Ohhhhh…shit!" He muttered, spinning on one set of toes and dashing headlong down the corridor even as the purple-clad goons yelled and took the occasional potshot at him. He managed to get a good distance away, and examined his sidearm. He had absolutely no idea what it did, or how to make it do what it did, so he ducked into an alcove and drew his broadsword…which mysteriously erupted in blue flames, the blade glowing brighter as his unknown pursuers closed in. Alert klaxons had begun to sound, and he dimly sensed more people approaching, but they were still far enough away for him to get the job done. As he sensed, more than heard the first goon come close to the alcove where he hid, he stepped out, swinging his sword in a powerful arc, and neatly severing the purple-clad thug. As the other three came around the corner, he noticed a group of six more running up behind them. His face set and his expression grim, he began to hack his way through the enemies, his blade now a hissing white-hot shaft of death. A few of the attackers in the back managed to get some shots off, one of which winged him in the left arm, which only served to make him angrier. Screaming a furious war cry that he wasn’t sure where he had heard, but sounded appropriate ("JIHAD!!!"), He rushed the remaining two thugs, swinging low then high, cutting the leg off the first one, then sinking his blade halfway into the chest of the other. The goon on his sword shuddered, shrieked in pain, then twitched and fell still. Casually kicking the corpse off his sword, he went over to the one with the severed leg, which had been cauterized by the heat of the blade. Placing one boot on the goon’s stomach and his swordpoint at his foe’s throat, he growled, "Why are you trying to kill me?" The thug giggled like a little child, and said in a high-pitched, sugary voice, "Oh, I can’t tell you that! It would spoil all the fun! Lord Barney has a BIIIIIIIG surprise for you, you nasty Jihaddi, oh yes he does!" Cerberus wrestled with his conscience. He could sense the security forces of this world getting closer than was comfortable…if he were to evade custody, he would have to leave now, possibly killing this person beforehand…however, dealing with local authorities might help him find a way home. Looking at his handiwork nearby on the floor and walls, he didn’t think the local yokels would be willing to chat. Raising his swordpoint, he prepared to drive a thrust into the goon’s heart, then stopped…{I am no murderer} he thought, running off down towards the doors marked ‘Landing Bays.’ Back where he was laying, Luv-Sergeant Elmo felt around in his pockets for that Happiness Energy Bar that Lord Barney had given him before starting the mission. Lord Barney had told them all that if they were captured, they were to eat the Happiness Energy Bar right away, so it could make them so happy they wouldn’t feel bad about failing their mission. Elmo unwrapped the granola bar, and took a huge bite out of it. He smiled and giggled as the security blueshirts came around the corner. The bar was already working…he felt so happy…soooo very happy….. …When the spaceport coroner did the autopsy on Luv-Sergeant Elmo later that day, he couldn’t suppress the shudder amd the chill that looking at the hideously happy grin on the corpse’s face. Cerberus wandered the landing bays, looking for at worst a place to hide, at best a ship to steal. Many of the vessels berthed were locked down tight, or were so massive that he knew he wouldn’t be able to fly them alone. Looking into yet another bay, he spied what looked to be a two-seater fighter craft. Perfect. And the cockpit was standing wide open. Even better. Scrambling up the ladder, barely noticing his still-bleeding arm, he hopped into the pilot’s seat and looked over the controls. Most of them seemed familiar enough. He pushed a switch marked "PWR" and heard a satisfying whine as the fighter’s reactor system came online. He then searched for the engine start switches, but was brought up short by the distinct click-whine of an energy weapon being primed, and the cool press of a barrel against his temple. "Take your hands off the controls and put them behind your head," said a neutral feminine voice, which had a slight purring undertone to it. Doing as he was told, he risked a sidelong glance at his captor, and saw what looked to be a female snow leopard, grey with black spots and rosettes, standing on the ladder holding a blaster to his head with a slightly cold glare in her eyes. He smiled and said quietly, "Uh…hi…Miss…uh." She cut him short. "My name’s Buran, and I think I will be the one asking the questions for now. Now, let’s start with who you are, and why you’re trying to swipe my ship…" …To Be Continued… Copyright Stephen D. Scott aka Centurion A. G. Cerberus May 1997 Centurion Ashur Galand Cerberus, Commanding Officer, WEDJEE Proud member of the Doberman Empire and the Jihad to Destroy B'Harnii the Dinosaur. Resident of the House Of Eternal Night, and one of the Kindred Children. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- aka Prof. Clayton Forrester, Evil Geniuses for a Better Tomorrow. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- WEDJEE-Weapons and Equipment Development for Jihad Expeditionary Efforts "Better Living Thru Advanced Weaponry!" ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Galand@cris.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Pursuant to USC 47, unsolicited commercial E-mail sent to this address is subject to a $500 archival fee per copy. E-mail recieved after any reciept of this notice implies acceptance of these terms. A copy of USC 47 may be found online at http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/47/ ------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Mark thine enemies, for all that separates the chosen from the damned is a spot of monochrome light, projected on the back of a neck." ---The Book Of Cataclysm -------------------------------------------------------------------------