"The unknown is the governing condition of war." -- Marshal Ferdinand Foch "You wanted combat for what? I don't know really why. Or really know why. Who wants true combat? But here it is..." -- Ernest Hemingway, _Across the River and Into the Trees_ Operation: Phoenix: Here Come the Bastards by J-Rock, jjr5020@rigel.tamu.edu Things had gone from bad to worse in a big hurry, Siona thought. Not only had five Lizard troopships appeared over Atlanta, but half her command had been vaped by said troopships over the course of a few seconds. She experimentally keyed her radio: "Mother to Mandarin Base. We're in deep shit. Request immediate air support." However, static was her only response. "They're jamming us, ma'am," came the JihadMech's driver over a tight-beam link. "All outgoing comm won't get through." "Shit. Ok, if you're pretty much beaten up, head back to the Lollipop as planned. Mother ou-- WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" # AC/DC "Hell's Bells" _Back in Black_ Everywhere around the city, the burnt-out corpses of BMWs began to reassemble themselves, pulling the wrecks of skyscrapers and other buildings to them in order to do this. Siona said, "Oh, you want some more?" as she triggered her lasers at the nearest BMW. The lasers ate away at the unusually shiny armor, sending a few rivulets of slag down the B'Harnate mech's body. The shine of the armor and the fact that the Bimmer didn't go down like a poleaxed steer told Siona volumes about the nature of said armor. "No way... B'Harne's been leafing through the Tactical Cheesebook! DIE!!!!" she said as she added her ER PPC and LRMs to the mix, knowing all too well their effects on glazed armor. Unfortunately, these didn't do much else as the CIWS turrets shot down the incoming missiles. To make matters worse, a blue nimbus surrounding the BMW diffused the man-made thunderbolt, making sure it didn't penetrate the armor. "Blueshield generator! This is Very Bad Pookie..." ************************************************************************* # White Zombie "I, Zombie" _Astro-Creep: 2000_ P-Chan had just finished propping Mongoose's Warhammer up against a sturdy-looking building when a six-armed BMW came down upon her, a whole assortment of nasty-looking close-combat weapons at the ready. The Gundam moved to match her physical adept reaction time by drawing a beam saber and chopping the BMW in half from 'nuts' to 'neck.' As the BMW tried to pull itself back together, P-Chan sprayed the stricken Mech with about ten shots from her beam rifle. "At least one weapon still works like it should against them," she said as she drew and powered up the second beam saber. P-Chan then tossed her extra beam saber to Don, who beheaded yet another Bimmer before splitting it in half like P-Chan had done with hers. "I'm getting some bio readings from these downed mecha," Noriko said. "They big enough for a human crew?" Owsen asked. He had found a crew on the BMW that he had boarded. Of course, he was expecting an old C-64 CPU instead. Can't win 'em all. "On some of them, yes," she replied. "The others have an even smaller bio reading." "Patch it over to me," J-Rock interjected. In the background, Don drilled the decapitated Bimmer head with his PPC as it tried to build a new body under it. "These readings are consistent with that Spongin drone fighter I shot down during the expedition to the B'Horn homeworld." "Meaning?" Owsen asked as he danced Catherine the WHAP-ASS out of the path of a Bimmer's particle cannon fire. "That some of these beasties are driven by crews--" "WOULD YOU PLEASE GET TO THE POINT?" "Let me finish. And the rest are being controlled by disembodied brains," J-Rock finished as Haji the Marauder-IIC let loose with another three-PPC blast that blew off the offending Bimmer's leg. "Disgusting," Noriko said. "But if they were taken from Spongins, I fail to see how that counts as an upgrade." Owsen chuckled in spite of himself. ************************************************************************* # Marilyn Manson "Get Your Gunn" _Portrait of an American Family_ Tim jumped his Wolverine behind a BMW and prepared to let fly with everything in its arsenal. But first, he would try to rip the engine out. The Wolverine's left fist struck home near the engine housing, but not with enough force to penetrate the armor. Owsen's voice came over the speakers: "Switch to bioscan and target what you find. It may just be what we need to get things going our way again." Tim did this, and found the small dime-sized dot to shoot at. "Ok, you little fucker, good night." Having made this display of savoir faire, Tim dropped his crosshairs and pulled the trigger. Argent green pulse laser fire burned away most of the rear armor, while the red pulse laser fire completed the job and then some. But the dot still remained on Tim's scanner until the slightly dimmer red of the small laser erased it. "YES!!!" Tim exulted. "Repair _that_, cocksucker!" The gigantic war machine spasmed before collapsing and detonating its engine. The released reaction scoured armor off of the Wolverine, evaporating a ton of armor almost instantly. Fortunately for Tim, the explosion did not cause a breach. Yet. "Whatever are we going to do with you, Tim?" Kazumi asked. "I have something in mind--," Tim began. "I don't even want to knoOHHH!!!!!" Kazumi replied as a BMW coming from behind brought a buzzsaw blade across her Enfield's right leg, amputating it from the knee down and sending the Enfield into an unrecoverable fall. "ONEESAMA!" Noriko cried. Kazumi blew off the hand holding the buzzsaw with her large laser, saying "Get out of here! Save yourself!" "After all we've been through? Come on!" Noriko shouted. Tim calmly extended his Wolverine's left arm at the BMW. A huge grappling claw shot out from the 'vambrace' and embedded itself in the BMW's torso. With a cry of "GET OVER HERE!!" from the external speakers, Tim reeled in the Mech, snapping the weapon free when the Bimmer was toe-to-toe with him. A thunderous right cross brought the BMW's head halfway around so that it was facing the rear. Consequently, it got a good view of Noriko bringing her Nightsky in for the kill. Her hatchet struck the head, splitting the head down the middle. The Nightsky's left fist hit the body near the engine housing. She withdrew the hatchet as the 'vambrace' swung open and a series of rods sprang out, embedding themselves in the armor in the same manner as the arm carrying them. Noriko yelled "BUSTER COLLIDER!!", and the rods began to deliver an electrical shock equal to that of ten high-tension power lines. Noriko then shut her eyes to block out the bright light overwhelming the Nightsky's visual sensors, screaming a primal scream as the BMW danced like a marionette under the control of a puppeteer on speed. At length, the BMW collapsed, all systems short-circuited beyond repair. The Collider rods retreated back into the Mech's left arm as Noriko walked it over to where the downed Enfield was. The Nightsky then picked up the Enfield under the shoulders before it loped off toward the C.B.G.B. Tim's Wolverine followed close behind, checking for any flank ambushes. ************************************************************************* The BMW fired again, and Siona could tell that she was losing this battle. A particle cannon caught the Guardian in the left leg, melting armor and scarring the metal framework underneath. A battery of three lasers carved gashes into the torso, while a missile launcher peppered the left arm and right leg. "Dammit!" she muttered. "I'm getting chewed up here!" "Look out, ma'am!" said the JihadMech driver as he levelled his Gauss rifle at the B'Harnate war machine. A huge silver ball shot out and impacted the Bimmer's right torso. The armor there folded like a gambler with nothing but garbage, and the ball's unspent momentum took it through the BMW's ribs. Secondary explosions took out the repair systems and the blueshield generator. Both MAUL mechs fired their PPCs, evaporating the armor over the center torso and the engine supports. The Torquemada shot both his LRM racks at the beast, sending two score missiles its way. The sheer volume of missiles proved to be too much for the CIWS turrets, as more than half finished what the PPCs started by detonating the BMW's reactor. Siona used the lull in the battle to think of a way to send for help. "Our radios are being jammed, right?" she asked the JihadMech driver. "Affirmative," he replied. "Hmmm," Siona hmmed. "The only tech they're prepared for is our own.. I KNOW!! Where's the captured radio station from here?" "My computer says it's three klicks west of here," said the Torquemada driver. "Head over there, best speed. We'll see if our B'Horn allies can get something through." ************************************************************************* # White Zombie "Blur the Technicolor" _Astro-Creep: 2000_ J-Rock sidestepped to the left, narrowly avoiding an autocannon blast from a BMW while returning fire with Haji's arm weapons. One of the PPCs missed, but the other one hit, shredding the armor near the autocannon muzzle. One medium pulse laser struck the head, doing nothing more than superheat some armor into vapor. The other pulse laser scarred the center torso armor, melting plush as it went. The Bimmer was so engrossed with trying to bring down the Marauder-IIC that it completely ignored the crippled Warhammer, which fired both its PPCs at the Bimmer. The cerulean spears impaled the BMW in the chest, fusing and melting the important parts on the autocannon as ammo rolled out through the opening made. Its appetite for destruction unsatiated, the PPC bolt ate into an ammo bay, igniting the shells stored there. The BMW convulsively shuddered as the explosion blossomed forth, shearing off the right arm and completely junking the autocannon. The second PPC tracked inward, and Mongoose's infrared sensors detected a very strong heat spike in the center torso. Must have really waxed the engine shielding, Mongoose thought. One more hit and it goes down. "But that's what SRMs are for," he said as he briefed them on their mission and scrambled them. The flight of six impacted the Bimmer, and explosions dotted the BMW's torso. One of the missiles found the crack in the engine shielding made by the PPCs, and the uncontrolled fusion reaction consumed everything in its reach, including the BMW. "Nice shot, Goose!" said J-Rock as he scanned the area for enemies, finding none. Just then, the girl-synth of Haji's computer announced an incoming message. J-Rock fielded the call and a head-and-shoulders shot of Tim filled his secondary monitor. "J, you better get over here," he said. "Kazumi's down." "She can't pop her hatch and ride with someone?" "She WON'T pop her hatch. She still wants to be able to punch out." "Roger that, I'll meet you halfway to the C.B.G.B." Closing the channel, he opened another one to Mongoose. "I gotta go for a bit. You gonna be alright back there?" "I ain't going anywhere," Mongoose replied darkly. ************************************************************************* # Metallica "The Four Horsemen" _Kill 'Em All_ P-Chan chopped another BMW into quarters with one of her beam sabers as she and Don continued the solemn task of putting the rejuvenated BMWs down for a second (and hopefully, the last) time. However, this was not an easy task by any stretch of the imagination. Bimmers that were thought down tried to get back up on several occasions, each time with devices created out of nowhere designed to negate the attack that did them in. "King's X!" cried P-Chan. "They've created the mechanical equivalent of the Barneyknocker!" "I'd like to meet the person who modified these things," Don said as the Pumpkin King let loose a barrage from all its medium lasers. "And rip his heart out with a tow truck." "It's a good thing we have our own Uncoilers against these pests," P said, waving the beam saber around for emphasis. The battle continued like this for a few minutes, with mecha going up and down the interstate loop and hastily-dispatched UN troops saying "DAARRGG?!" as they tried to get out of the way. But then things took a turn for the worse. A BMW came out from behind the Georgia Dome, arm-mounted railgun blazing away as plasma cannons on both shoulders glowed with charge. The Gundam ducked behind its shield and juked like crazy. The few projectiles that did hit the Gundam only hit the shield, but the pounding was taking its toll on both machine and woman. As the plasma cannons fired, P-Chan tried to dodge and block with the shield, but she was no cyborg. The beam pierced the weakened shield and hit the Gundam low in the left side. Wires popped out of instrument panels as P was thrown violently about inside the cockpit. The second beam was far more damaging. It caught Don's orange BattleMaster in the left side as well, boiling away armor and the endo-steel ribs there. To make matters worse, it also scored the magazine for the left arm machine gun. As the ammo cooked off, bullets flew from the torso in all directions, but mostly out the back of the Mech. Also, the boxy SRM launcher mounted on the left shoulder leapt straight up into the air like a launched model rocket. The BattleMaster was still in the fight, although it was also in a bad way. Shaking out the cobwebs caused by electrical feedback from the ammo explosion, Don just now realized that he had also lost the arm that held P-Chan's spare beam saber. As he regarded the severed limb, the particle blade derezzed with a strange finality. It was almost as if it were saying, "Good luck, sucker. You're gonna need it now." Don raised his ER PPC at the Bimmer. "You forgot THIS, cock-knob," he said as cerulean fire leapt out once more, hitting the enemy Mech in the right shoulder. The azure beam ate away at the spot where plasma cannon joined torso, leaving it to hang slowly by a thread before it began to work its way back into place. "This is VERY BAD!!" Don said into the radio. "Get out of there, Don!" P-Chan replied. "I'll cover you!" "You're hit," Don replied. "Withdraw and we'll cover each other." "I may be hit," P-Chan said as the Gundam cast away the useless shield, "but not bad. Now go! I can handle this!" Don obediently withdrew from the skirmish, as self-preservation was one of his attributes, in addition to tactical sensibility. It would be futile to continue fighting these odds in a badly damaged Mech. P-Chan shifted the beam saber to her left hand as she unslung the beam rifle. While she did this, she searched for the enemy's open channel and found it. She then flew forward, rifle blazing as she yelled into her throat mike, "ALIEN BASTARDS!! I'll send all of you to Hell!" ************************************************************************* # 'Weird Al' Yankovic "Slime Creatures from Outer Space" _Dare To Be Stupid_ Mongoose was well into a telnet session to FurryMUCK on the secondary monitor in order to pass the time. How a BattleMech computer was able to access the Internet was anybody's guess, but at this point, Mongoose didn't really care. Anything to ward off the demon Ennui. Suddenly, a proximity alarm went off. Mongoose quit, shut down the SLIP connection, and punched up the source of the alert. A small squad of Lizards was trying to enter the Mech from the building that held it up. "Funk off," he said as the right arm PPC came up to aim at the floor that the squad was on. Then man-made lightning cleansed the entire floor. A heavy thump on the bulkhead told Mongoose that one of their number had survived, and was on his Mech's hatch trying to rip it open. Mongoose said, "Sorry, no free rides!" as he triggered the BRP flechette pack placed next to the hatch in case someone tried to open it. Thousands of hard plastic slivers flew out at the Lizard, most imbedding themselves in the armor. The volume of slivers meant that quite a few found vulnerable spots, and whatever wasn't covered was shredded. Unfortunately for the interloper, his face was one of the things that was shredded. Needless to say, he didn't die a happy alien. Mongoose looked at his primary viewer only to find an even more disturbing sight. A whole combined arms company of Spongin infantry and tanks was advancing on his position. He immediately brought both arm PPCs to bear on the lead tank and fired. Both beams cored into the front of the tank, shredding a tread and somehow hitting the fuel tank along the way. The lead tank brewed up into a pretty fireworks display as the other three tanks spread out in a wedge formation. The flanking tanks let a flock of missiles fly at the wounded Warhammer. The Goalie anti-missile machine gun opened up, batting down all but seven missiles, which pockmarked the Warhammer's torso armor. Just then, one of the infantry units launched another swarm of SRMs at Mongoose. An out-of-ammo message appeared on the HUD as the missiles released their cargo of flaming liquid at the Mech. Inferno rounds! thought Mongoose. Not like that may matter much, but they're still deadly. Mongoose let the offending platoon have it with his machine gun, decimating it with a single blast. But still, they kept on coming, just like they did at Richland Mall. If I don't get help soon, he thought grimly, that'll be all she wrote. ************************************************************************* "HOLY SHIT!" Tim said as a Bimmer appeared from out of nowhere and launched a couple of Thunderbolt missiles at the ad-hoc TAMUBGD Mech lance. An explosive shout from Noriko indicated that another Bimmer had come from the front, cutting off their escape. The Enfield and Nightsky fired their lasers at the mechanical menace facing them, but they failed to breach the armor, which was already beginning to regenerate. The Wolverine caught a Thunderbolt to its right leg, and the last of the armor on that limb flew away on jets of expanding gas. The other Thunderbolt drilled Noriko's Nightsky right square in the back. Making short work of the armor there, the warhead went on to blow out the gyroscope in the center torso. Balancing BattleMechs was impossible without these gyros, and the Nightsky went down for the last time. "J, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?" Tim shouted into his comlink as he shot his Bimmer with the large pulse laser. By some incredible stroke of luck, the green laser bolts hit the next Thunderbolt missile while it was still in the launcher, and the entire left side of that Bimmer fell off as a cataclysmic explosion rocked it. Tim then shot out the grapple, yelling "COME HERE!!" over the external speaker. The grapple grabbed the exposed engine, crushing the shielding and releasing a fusion reaction which consumed both BMW and claw. Before Tim could even jump out of the way, numerous lasers from the BMW behind him chipped away at the thin rear armor. Almost instantenously, the armor melted away to reveal the internal structure and components, which two railguns almost hit. Instead, the steel balls shattered the titanium bones in the damaged right leg. The Wolverine hit the ground hard as the right leg buckled. The impact ripped half the extra-light engine out of its housing, failsafes snuffing the reaction before it could reach critical mass. Also, the impact of landing slammed Tim's helmeted head against a side console, knocking him unconscious just as the Wolverine lost power. ************************************************************************* J-Rock walked Haji around the corner to find a number of Lizards pulling the two women and Tim's barely conscious form out of their Mechs. He trained his crosshairs on a clump of Lizards not even near the captured MechWarriors and triggered a pulse laser. Ruby red bolts sent Lizard corpses flying as J-Rock's voice came over the external speaker: "You assholes better move!" A Lizard's voice echoed in J-Rock's head, "I believe the same should be said for you!" J-Rock looked up just in time to see the BMW fire its lasers and railguns. A number of lasers missed, but a few hit the Marauder-IIC's left leg. One of the railgun bullets hit the same leg, crushing the remainder of the ferro-fibrous armor there before severing the myomers leading to Haji's foot. One more hit, J thought, and that leg comes off! With that, J punched up a bioscan overlay and aimed at the small dot representing the Bimmer's brain. As soon as a smaller gold dot in the recticle pulsed, J did the only thing he could under the circumstances: fire all the Mech's weapons, and to Hell with the consequences of heat. The PPCs' azure lightning dug a deep hole in the armor over the chest. One pulse laser went slightly wide, scoring the left torso armor, but the other continued to eat away at the armor, wearing it down to paper-thickness. As for the ER small lasers, they hit the chest in a tight grouping, piercing the armor and eating away at the internal structure. The coherent light did not stop until it vaporized the brain. In the meantime, the Bimmer got its own shots off. The lasers lanced into J-Rock's Mech in the side torsos, the right arm, and the left leg. Endo steel supports turned white-hot, but did not melt just yet. The twin railguns hit the legs as J-Rock slapped the shutdown override button for a second time. Steel balls pockmarked the right leg armor and finished the job started on the left leg. As it spiraled away, J-Rock twisted in his command couch in a futile attempt to keep Haji up. As the Mech began to fall, he shouted, "AARRRGH!! Fuck me with a number-twelve piledriver and forty square feet of curare-dipped, wrought-iron cemetery fencing without lubrication!" For about a minute, no Lizard dared to approach the Mech as waves of heat emanated off of it. J-Rock used this time to unstrap himself, shed his cooling vest, shut down the Mech, and grab his XRifle from behind the seat. As he depressurized the cabin, he summoned Da Holy Sibling-Sawblade and slinged that on his back. Configuring the soft-suit's enviro-controls to automatic, he popped the hatch and found himself within spitting distance of three Lizards with plasma pistols. "Back off," he said as he levelled the XRifle at them. Then he felt the muzzle of a pistol against the back of his head. Dropping the XRifle, he turned around slowly to find a fourth Lizard. The "honor guard" marched J-Rock down to the street, stopping when they were before a Lizard who exuded authority. A leader-type, J thought before the Lizard's voice said, "Remove your helmet." J-Rock did this, and the voice said, "YOU!" "Yeah, that's right, me. Now, if I may be so bold as to ask, just what the Hell are you doing here?" "Seeing as how you won't live too much longer, I suppose I could honor your request. We are the X'hirjq. We were offered the opportunity to attack this planet by the one known as B'Harnii in return for our help in destroying the group known as the Jihad." Has B'Harne become so desperate, J-Rock thought, that he'd sell out the planet just to be rid of us? Almost instantly, the movie projector in his head spewed out a familiar movie quote: "It's not his goddamn planet! Understand, monkey boy?" B'Harne was a B'Horn renegade, an E.T. who thought along the lines of Milton's Satan in regards to preferring to reign than to serve. The Lizard must've been thinking the same thing, for the voice said, "Do not be alarmed. We have no need to conquer this planet." J pushed that aside, saying "But do you do anything else besides make war?" "I am a warrior and a hunter of Clan T'qaal'xqa! The hunt is all that matters to me!" "Dyin' ain't much of a living, boy," Tim offered, his voice a near perfect imitation of Clint Eastwood. "SILENCE!!" the leader sent to Tim. Turning back to J-Rock, she sent, "Your name wasn't on our list, but you have shown that you possess the instincts of a warrior. I hereby offer you a warrior's death. You may use your sword, if you wish." "So what you're saying is that you're willing to forego the firing squad and let us kill each other like civilized sentients?" "Exactly." "I accept, but on two conditions: First, for every time I wound you, you let one of my friends go. Second, if I win, you let all of us go." The Lizard leader laughed a short, barking laugh. "Very well. It begins," she sent as she swiped at J-Rock, who barely managed to duck out of the way while drawing Da Sawblade. # Kodo "'The Hunted' Main Theme" _"The Hunted" soundtrack_ [In case you didn't know (and I'll bet most of you don't) who Kodo are, they are a way cool taiko (traditional Japanese) drum group. -- J-R] The Lizard thrust her claws out again, allowing J-Rock to sidestep the thrust and roll under the Lizard's follow-up backfist. Swinging Da Sawblade in a wide overhand arc, J-Rock drew a phosphorescent blue-green line down the leader's right shoulder blade before a tail-swipe struck him with all the force of a speeding car. Fortunately, the soft-suit absorbed the brunt of the blow, but J was sent sprawling as he tumbled to a stop about ten feet away. I'm lucky those spines didn't hit me, J thought as he painfully drew in a breath. The leader put a hand to the cut and regarded the blood that collected there. "Lucky hit," she sent. "Luck's what some call talent when they have none," J-Rock retorted. The leader dropped into a crouch, folded her hands together, and popped J in the bread-basket with a nice two-handed hammerblow. The Lizard went in to try and punt the breathless TRES Admiral, and J put one hand on the flat of Da Sawblade to set for a block. However, before the blow came, J did what was known as a "butcher boy:" fake a block, then make a cut or stab to the midsection. With a flick of his wrist, the chainsword chewed through armor and bit flesh, causing the scar on the armor to fill with blood as well. "Bah. Dishonorable tactic," the leader sent. "I had hoped for better from you." "Come now," J-Rock said. "The Olympics are a few months away yet." The Lizard threw herself at J once more, hoping to bring him down with a flying tackle. The Admiral allowed himself a brief smile before pulling off his impression of Haohmaru's Kogetsuzan. The whirling blade caught the Lizard in the left collarbone, sending even more X'hirjq blood into the air. J looked at the sidelines for his friends and comrades. They were still being held by the Lizards, with one each for Noriko and Kazumi, and two for Tim. "I count three wounds," J-Rock said. "Why haven't they been freed?" "You still think you're Moses, don't you?" the leader asked before guffawing loudly. "Let my people go!" J-Rock barked. "YOU FOOL! Why would I deprive myself of the fruits of battle?" she bellowed in J's head as she raked at J's chest with her claws. J tried to roll with the blow, but the claws had pierced the soft-suit, tearing it slightly and sending a burning sensation through his chest. J tried to block the leader's punch, but all his strength seemed to have left him as the ham-sized fist connected with his face, bloodying his nose and putting him back on the ground. "I only agreed to your deal in order to get more fight out of you!" the leader sent as she withdrew a spear from a back harness. J felt for Da Sawblade, only to find it about two feet beyond the leader. "I'll let you in on a secret, J-Rock. That X'hirjq lieutenant you killed in Waco was MY SISTER!!" The leader then stomped on J-Rock's leg, cracking the bones under her heel. J-Rock screamed with agony as the burning in his chest was replaced by a dull throbbing, a telltale sign of poisoning. "Open your eyes," J said weakly. "She killed herself to avoid capture by the 187th FTL Cavalry and I." "No matter," the leader said as she raised the spear over her head in a two-handed grip. "This dialogue bores me. Prepare to die!" J gathered his strength and extended his arms toward the Lizard, palms at a perpendicular angle. As the Lizard began her downstroke, J triggered the soft-suit's attack mode, hosing it with a sustained burst of grazer force-packets. The leader wavered on her feet for a second before crashing to earth, taking the pressure off of J-Rock's busted leg. After a moment of silence, J said, "Like the country song says, you gotta have an ace in the hole." Noriko and Kazumi wriggled out from their shocked captors' grasps and began to pull J into a sitting position. "Looks like I win," J said. "Now, if you'll excuse me, we shall take our leave." "I'm afraid all of you will be leaving this _life_," sent the Lizard second-in-command. As the assembled Lizards brought their rifles to bear, Noriko shouted, "Wait! You're supposed to let us go! We had a deal!" The second replied, "Your leader's deal was with my leader. And it died with her." Before she could issue orders to kill the incapacitated Majahid, a bright light, like that of a miniature sun, blazed into being overhead. The stress of dealing with the bright light was too much for J's battered body, and he lapsed into unconsciousness. # KMFDM "Light" _Angst_ The Lizards hissed like vampires being exposed to sunlight and covered their eyes with their hands or arms. Plasma bolts exploded everywhere, and Tim decided it was time to make a run for it. However, one of his minders caught him by the ankle, tripping him up. The Lizard then pulled her pistol and aimed it at Tim before a pair of blades emerged from the Lizard's chest and a midnight-blue arm twisted its head sharply to the left. The Lizard fell on its face to reveal a midnight-blue robot. Tim said, "Saved by a Smoke clone. Everybody knows that Scorpion is much cooler." Smoke said in a sideband voice, [I don't see any clones around here. By the way, don't knock it. You could've been Purina Lizard Chow.] Smoke withdrew his blades and bent the dead minder's thumb back, allowing Tim to get his leg free. Tim pulled himself next to Smoke and whispered, "I'm just playing with you. Don't tell anyone this, but back there, I would've welcomed a rescue by _Sub-Zero._" Tim's hatred of Sub-Zero was well-known amongst the MK players in the TAMUBGD. [Oh-kay,] Smoke said before continuing on his way. Tim scrambled on all fours towards J-Rock's discarded XRifle. Picking it up, he raked a group of Lizards, yelling "COME AND GET IT, MOTHERFUCKERS!" ************************************************************************* THREE MINUTES LATER... J-Rock looked up through the haze clouding his vision and beheld a tall blonde in black looking down on him. Even though his vision was clouding up, the third eye in the forehead was unmistakable. Drawing a breath, he said, "My dear Miss Harding, we have got to stop meeting like this." Diana laughed and said to no one in particular, "Amazing. The Jihad enters that time when all have turned against them and are seeking their lives, and some people still find the strength to tell jokes." Kazumi scratched at the back of her short black hair and said, "Some things never change." "Thank God," Noriko added from where she was ministering to Tim. He had taken a plasma bolt low on his right side. "Riko! Zumi!" J said. "How'd you survive the shooting?" "Diana here threw up a shield after sending the light ball our way," Kazumi said. "You wouldn't believe the amount of fire aimed at you." "I'm glad I missed it," J remarked. "It may not be one of SW2's shields," Diana replied -- SW2 being an abbreviation for Snow White (Solar Warrior's spousal-type object), "but it's good enough. Now let's get you fixed up." She passed her hand over J-Rock's chest, a warm golden glow emenating from her hand. As she was doing this, J said, "So how did you know that we needed help, with JihadHigh One being in hiding and all?" "You can thank Mother Siona when you see her. If it wasn't for her reaching the B'Horn, you probably wouldn't be talking. There, that takes care of the poison. Let's see to your leg." A pause. "So, is it just you here, or did you bring any of the other Skate Valkyries with you?" "I believe Yama's commanding your old ship, the Grimace. Nancy was in Vegas, and we couldn't reach her in time." "All right! Tell Kristi I'm glad my old command's in good hands. One last thing: Why is Tim still breathing after taking a wound like that?" Diana replied with an infuriating smirk. "Never mind." ************************************************************************* WHILE THAT WAS GOING ON... # Little Richard "Long Tall Sally" Kristi Yamaguchi sat pensively in the conn of the Grimace. The descent into Earth's atmosphere had been a cake-walk compared to the blockade run at Earth's LEO. Even now, she was thanking God and her ancestors that bits of Grimace were not now joining the wrecked hulks that used to be CyberPyro's TCN task force. She thought back to the prerecorded message that J-Rock had left to anyone who would take the Grimace's center seat in his place. In it, he had said as his closing statement, "She's a good ship, a bitch sometimes, but she'll always give you her all." That last part was being proven today, she thought before the tacoff's voice interrupted her: "One minute to target, ma'am." "All right, lock the grazer cannons on targets, and fire at will," she answered. "I want clean kills on these. I don't want any of them shooting back at us." "Aye aye, ma'am." ************************************************************************* [Milady!] a young Lizard leftentant said from her station. [I have detected a large unknown capital ship headed right for us.] [WHAT?!] shouted the Lizard commander. [Can you identify?] [Working.. Looks like a B'Horn configuration to me, although most of the technology on the ship is dated-- It's a Solar Ishtari battleship!] [SCRAMBLE THE FLEET! Charge the ion cannon now!] the commander shouted as twin beams of coherent gravity wrenched a landing craft in half almost instantly. ************************************************************************* P-Chan leaned her Gundam against a building and took stock of the damage. In her berserker rage, she had single-handedly wiped out every BMW foolish enough to face her. However, the Bimmers had left their marks on the Gundam as well: most of her armor was dented and pockmarked. She lost her beam rifle somewhere in the carnage, and the lower half of the left leg to boot. Usually the loss of a leg was the kiss of death for a BattleMech, but it was not as bad for a fully-flight-capable Mech like the Gundam. P-Chan looked up to see the Grimace pass overhead, followed almost immediately by a firestorm of laser bolts which the Grimace was weathering quite well while returning fire with force blasts. TRES Corps-spec Sullas and Visigoths danced with the black Lizard aerofighters in a battle for the skies. P punched up a list of her Mech's stores and found a weapon she had previously overlooked. "Heavy beam cannon, eh?" she said as she brought it online. A cannon longer than the average Mech's arm unfolded from the right shoulder, with the right arm grabbing a pistol-grip underneath the barrel. # AC/DC "Big Gun" _"Last Action Hero" soundtrack_ She pointed the cannon at a Lizard heavy fighter and pulled the trigger. An azure beam not unlike a PPC's in color blazed forth, skewering the airplane dead center. The armor, shields, and engine crumpled before it like sand castles before a tsunami. Its energy not yet spent, the beam clawed even higher into the sky, blowing another Lizard fighter to Hell in a fiery mess. "They weren't kidding when they said this thing was heavy," P said to herself in a tone of reverent awe. "Too much club for these fighters, though. Let's see how they'd like it if I cleaned house on one of their landing craft!" With that, she lit the jets and flew low and fast toward the laser fire. ************************************************************************* "What was that?" a slight redhead asked from her helm position. The scattered opening position of the Jihad had also affected the Solar Ishtari, meaning that the Grimace was being run by a skeleton crew. "I don't know, Nausicaa, but I'm going to find out," Kristi said. "Get a fix on that energy blast and open a channel." As the video kicked in, showing the pilot's face, Kristi said, "P-Chan! Once again, you amaze me." "I amaze myself, Yama," P replied. "This heavy beam cannon is something else. You should try this." "No thanks. I have something a little more powerful here." "Could you use a hand with the landing craft?" "We're fine here. We only have two more to go." "Captain!" said the tacoff. "I'm picking up a power buildup on the lead craft! It appears to be a weapon's charging cycl--" # Metallica "For Whom the Bell Tolls" _Ride the Lightning_ As the Grimace atomized the fourth landing craft with grazer packets, the lead craft's ion cannon spoke for the first time since they arrived. Under normal circumstances, the Grimace would have withstood the impact, but the proud ship was weakened from the blockade run and laser fire. The ion beam impaled the Grimace slightly ahead and to the right of the bridge. "Damage report!" Kristi shouted. "Heavy damage to all decks," responded the science officer. "Shield generator out, primary manuevering out, estimated 40% power remaining." "Auxillary manuevering shorted!" Nausicaa shouted. "I forgot to tell you," P said. "I saw that ion cannon vaporize a BattleMech assault lance." "Now you tell me," Kristi replied sourly. "Grimace out. Return fire!" The grazer beams stabbed at the lead craft. The first one struck dead center, bringing down the shields and crushing the armor. However, the second missed. The lasers from the craft gouged great chunks out of the stricken battlewagon. "I've lost the vector thrusters!" cried Nausicaa. "We're going down!" "Sound collision!" Kristi barked. "BRACE FOR IMPACT!" ************************************************************************* P-Chan saw the Grimace begin to list to port in its final descent before it plowed into the soil of Georgia, leaving a scar in the earth almost a mile long. "DIE!" she shouted, firing the cannon. The azure beam went wide of the craft, which responded by firing its lasers in all directions. Most of these missed, but one of them managed to connect, amputating the left arm at the elbow. P-Chan darted behind a building, avoiding the rest of the lasers. She went that way for a few moments before making a turn down a side street and dropping to her stump of a left knee. Steadying the cannon, she looked for the craft, finding it flying in a holding pattern, apparently searching for survivors. P said, "Game over, Lizards." The cannon vomitted forth its bolt once again, this time striking the troopship in the engines. ************************************************************************* As the craft began to plummet to the planet surface, the leftenant read out the cannon's litany of harm: [Shields have been overloaded! Engines and manuevering dead! Weapons systems have taken heavy damage! Communications are out as well! What shall we do?] The commander cuffed the younger Lizard and said in a grating voice, [We die. And hope the Goddess has mercy on us.] The fireball from the crashing ship could be seen from as far away as Mississippi. ************************************************************************* P-Chan gingerly brought the Gundam to its foot, shutting down the cannon as it did so. When she saw the fireball, there was only one thing she could do. With an accompanying gesture from the Gundam, she said over the external speakers, "YES!" The obligatory celebration done, she turned on the radio and broadcast over all Jihad frequencies. "This is Gundam Alpha. If anyone on or from the Grimace is reading me, acknowledge this transmission. I repeat, anybody on or from the Grimace that is reading me, please acknowledge this transmission." After a couple of minutes, Kristi's face appeared over a static snarled connection. "Gundam Alpha, this is the Grimace, or what's left of it. Do you copy? Over." "No, I generally email," P responded. "You have been hanging around J-Rock far too long." "This from one who hangs around Solar Warrior." "Touche, Mademoiselle P-Chan. Take thy beak from out my heart. You know, I remember a time when you didn't even know any of the people around here." "Ancient history, Yama. Thank God you're alive." "I've had worse days. Right now, I have a hard time thinking of one." "You all right?" "Nothing a year in Hawaii can't fix." P-Chan laughed. "I'll head back to the C.B.G.B. now." "Take care." "Thanks. Gundam Alpha out." ************************************************************************* AND THEN... Don fired a PPC bolt at a tank that was harassing the Mystic Mongoose. The beam of unbound lightning hit the turret, blowing it off completely. Mongoose's Warhammer, still burning from the inferno gel coating it, put his own PPC blast into the same tank only to hit its heavily armored front. Using his BattleMaster's lasers to roast a few Spongin infantry troopers, Don ran towards the damaged tank and place-kicked it. The vehicle flew a few feet to land on another tank right beside it. Fortunately for the crew, they were not too badly hurt. However, the damage from the collision broke open the reactor shielding on the fusion power plant. Both tanks went up in the uncontrolled reaction. As the infantry fled, Mongoose shouted over the external speakers, "You buncha pussies!!" Don marched up right next to the immobilized Mech as the last of the fires on it burned out. Mongoose popped his hatch and got out. Don lowered the boarding ladder as his external pickups picked up 'Goose's quip: "I am Victor, the Kalvinator." Don laughed over his external speakers and said, "Let's head for home. We've nailed our names in this city's history books enough for one day." Mongoose replied, "Fine with me." As the Pumpkin King BattleMaster marched off into the sunset, Mongoose looked back at the Warhammer and said, "I need a tougher Mech." ************************************************************************* ONE DAY LATER A Cluster of Mechs under Peaceout's command had dropped in to relieve the battered and weary saviors of Atlanta. That freed up Siona's forces to go hook up with Most Holy near Chicago. J-Rock did manage to get her to leave a Vixen and a Summoner behind for Noriko and Kazumi. Owsen had carried Windigo back into base camp a few hours ago. The look on their faces, plus the fact that Shardik was nowhere to be found, told the tale of an even tougher battle with some demon named Charn-El. Diana had to oversee the wreckage of the Grimace, which was headed for the recycling bins of the Solar Ishtari Space Fleet Shipyards. The Jihad had held on against the horde, but once again at tremendous cost. A troop transport set down near J-Rock's tent, rousing him from a dreamless sleep. It bore the block ATM of the TAMU B'Harne Genocide Division, and the name stenciled across the bow read: AMS QUENTIN CORYATT The ramp lowered, and a number of men in silver CVR-3 armor with black trim marched out. On each of their shoulders was an upper-case 'K' superimposed over a lightning bolt, the emblem of TRES's Kappa Squad. "We came as soon as we could, Admiral," Bane said. "What's up?" "You missed a hell of a battle," J-Rock replied. "Dammit, yet another hurry-up-and-wait," Aruba said, dangerously on the brink of entering Rant Mode. "What are you going to be needing us for?" Dan Wood asked. "This is what I wanted to talk to Owsen about," J replied. "Kylun tells me that JFox left HQ yesterday. He isn't here now, and our CAP flyers have had no luck in finding him. I have reason to believe that he may be missing." J-Rock looked at each of his squad members in turn. "We're going out to look for him." "I'm afraid that won't be necessary," came a female voice behind him. "Diana, did yo--" J-Rock said as he turned around to regard JFoxGlov and Maeve. "My apologies, Maeve. It's just that when I hear a female voice coming from behind me when I'm in council, I think it's Diana." Maeve smiled and said, "Don't worry about it. I was driving down here when I saw JFox here by the side of the road." JFox said, "I got jumped by some Bimmers coming down here. I'm lucky they didn't check me out to make sure I was dead." "JFox!" J said. "Last time I saw you, you were in Aggieland. How'd you get over here?" "I got Bob to fly me back to Waco so I could drive back to Kansas. From there I picked up a WHAP-ASS and tried to join you guys." "You certainly took your sweet time getting here!" Owsen said as he walked out to meet the growing throng. "What'd you do, _walk_ all the way over here?" "As a matter of fact, I did," JFox replied. "Uh, JFox, you do know that the WHAP-ASS has full-flight capability?" JFox's vulpine face took on a sheepish expression as he buried it in his Glov'd hand and shook it. "Thought so," Owsen said amidst the chuckles coming from Kappa Squad. "Silly!" added Maeve. "Cool it, Kappas," J said. "JFox, maybe I can get you a Dire Wolf-A to drive in case the Bimmers come back." "I'm afraid it'll have to wait," LTO said. "I just received flash traffic from TRES HQ. The Lizards are planning a full-scale offensive there." To be continued... All material copyrighted by the original author.