Operation Pacifica: Radio Free Pacifica!
by Trooper Charcharadon (highland@iastate.edu)

[settheme = "Kill Your Television" Ned's Atomic Dustbin, God Fodder]

        Three dozen mixed Jihaddi crept quietly towards a building
  near the southeastern edge of the sponge city.  Since their tangle with a
  force of HellWyrm Bots earlier, luck had decided to smile on them for a
  while.  They had traversed several miles while encountering only token
  resistance which they had subdued ruthlessly.

        They had also come across several battle sites where other
  Jihaddi had experienced much worse luck, the result of which was that the
  group had substantially increased their ammo reserves as well as acquiring a
  collection of heavier weapons.  They had even managed to jury-rig together a
  Nemesis Battle Armor from parts.  While not even close to what anyone would
  call "field ready", it hadn't stopped operating yet.  If luck continued to
  hold, it might stay operational long enough for them to accomplish their
  mission.  Every trooper mentally crossed their fingers; when you ask Lady
  Luck for too much, she tends to get miffed.

        "Hello out there everyone!  This is Willie here at KBRN
  radio, all Barney All the Time!  Just letting you know that I luv all of you
  lots and lots.  Hey, let's sing a song!" chirped Willie cheerfully into the
  microphone as he pressed play again.  There was only one song on the tape
  loop, and it played over and over and over and over and (you get the idea)
  but nobody ever called the radio station to complain.  So KBRN kept blasting
  away, 24 - 7, over all possible frequencies.  The sounds of battle hardly
  reached the spongies stationed here, protected by immense amounts of
  shielding.

        The battle announced itself with the explosion of the
  armored exterior door into whirling fragments of death which howled their
  way down the corridors of the building.  The first rank of sponge guards
  were cut down by the shrapnel, and the second rank were still covering their
  ears from the loud noise when three dozen Jihaddi came charging at them, X-
  Rifles blazing.  The Nemesis Battle Armor came clomping behind them, more
  effective in these quarters at causing fear than actually shooting anything.

        Willie was beginning to get worried as the gunfire got
  closer and louder.  Barney had told them that the bad Jihaddi might show up
  on the island, but this place was supposed to be safe, wasn't it?  He was
  still trying to process that thought and come to a conclusion when the
  control room door crashed open and Charcharadon charged in, accompanied by a
  half dozen Doberman Empire troops.  The control room guards opened up on
  them, shooting up the walls, two desks, and a telex machine.  The Jihaddi
  returned fire, shooting up the guards, clock, communications ground line
  terminal, and DJ.  As the firing ceased, a single, strident, insistent alarm
  trumpeted out, accompanied by flashing lights.

        "Why'd he have to pick an alarm switch to die on?  Stupid
  spongie," commented one of the Dobermen.

        "Never mind that," said Charcharadon as he pulled Willie's
  body off of the transmitter controls.  "Let's enact a little Communications
  Decency."  He hit the stop button and the Dark Hymn died abruptly in mid-
  stanza.  Clearing his throat, Charcharadon switched on the microphone.

        "Ahem.  This is KDUH! radio, and we're going to play you a
  different selection for a while before we suddenly and permanently go off
  the air.  So, one last time, here's the music!"

        Fishing wildly around in his pocket, he stuck the first tape
  he came across in the machine and pressed play.  The Jihaddi left the room
  as "Hail Britania, Britania rules the waves!" boomed out of every receiver
  on the island.  Passing out into the hallway, they came across the TRES
  Corps marine who had been operating the Nemesis.  It was standing motionless
  in the hallway and she was kicking it in the shins.

        "Damn thing konked out on me," she griped.

        "Well, we're lucky it worked in the first place.  Set the
  self destruct timer and let's get out of here before they send
  reinforcements."

        Two minutes later, the radio waves went silent.

[To be continued in Operation Pacifica: George of the Jungle?]